A month or two ago, Lydia and I celebrated our 2-year anniversery. I wanted to give her a ring, because I do like how something that simple expresses something more enduring. I texted her mom (or so I thought, apparently I texted a former colleague with the same name) asking for Lydia's ring-size and told her NOT TO DRAW ANY CONCLUSIONS.
I don't know about you, but my mother pounces upon every single reference to marriage, children, love and living like a donkey-crazed vulture. But right after sending that text I wondered 'why the hell shouldn't she draw a conclusion?' so I got to thinking....
And after a couple of weeks, I knew I wanted to marry Lydia. I mean, I've known it for a really long time, but taking that step, mentally, is something else. I have to admit that I didn't decide that upon reasons truly romantic, I know about the value of marriages nowadays, and even though I am convinced that we will stay together forever, I know life. But I do want to show Lydia that she is the one for me, I do want to have children asap and I do want to have one hell of a party. These three things combined are made easier by getting married.
So.... First off: the ring. I wanted something silver 'cause I know Lydia likes that and I like it a lot better than gold. I searched on Etsy for two nights and then found the perfect ring, silver with titanium leaf-patterns. When it got delivered, I told Lydia that it was a grind-tape, since I had received such a tape a week previously in exactly the same kind of box, that was lucky. She believed me, for why would I lie about music, so that was taken care of. Now the asking.
I decided to "ask" the prents first. I didn't really ask for her hand, but I did inform them and hoped for their consent. I told Lydia that I'd be away to my brother (who lives some 20 km away from them, so kinda not really a lie), and I spent a pretty awesome afternoon at her parents. Apparently, they had expected me to come and tell about my plans for marriage because "I sounded nervous on the phone". NO I DIDN'T! I was really calm and composed. But anyways, both them thought that it'd be Lydia's choice first and foremost, and as long she is happy, they were happy, and they had no reason to suspect that she was unhappy at the time. They had already accepted me as family anyways, so why not go all the way :). Even her little brother smiled and was happy and proud even, and that's really special. He's a peculiar, but awesome guy who plays games and draws all the time and doesn't really have a social existence outside that. But he was looking forward to the party and the bachelor party and all that! Sweet. On to step 3.
We had decided upon going on vacation to my parents since we needed the money for the new house, and they live right at the seaside, so some summery fun could be had. I had been checking the weather for some time, and everything pointed to Tuesday as the best day for asking, not too warm, dry, everything a boy'd need. I knew about a small enclosure in the dunes which has an excellent view on the setting sun while being out of reach of the general passers-by. Ahahahahahahahah! This would be the day.
But it wasn't.
Storm and rain kinda ruined the plan a bit :(. So while my mom and Lydia were dropping small hints about rings and marriage I ignored them and moved on to plan B. Except there wasn't one. Save: try later.
That Wednesday, we went to a really cute place nearby my parents, the weather was pretty good and when we were sitting at a quaint harbour, I thought "maybe here?". Except that Lydia made an impertinent remark on how we'd spend the night (you'd think she'd be married already) which kinda ruined the romantic vibe for me :).
Later that evening, it looked like it'd be dry for some hours, quite stormy but still, but I thought "fuck it, LET'S DO THIS!" because I know I love postponement too much, and it'd take forever.
We walked the beach, alone, and we sat down on a small table on the beach. I brought a bottle of wine and some glasses, and we drinked and talked a bit about the future. Then I told her that I had lied to her. That I had visited her parents a couple of days ago, and I asked her if she would mind being called my wife, while I fumbled with the 35095 boxes surrounding that damn ring. She was flabbergasted but the 'ýes!' was fairly understandable :)
Tadaa! SO! Now we're engaged! We'll probably get married at the end of next year, when both housing and jobbing are resolved. All of you are invitred, whatever Lydia says, and I expect a Strawman Fallacy reunion show at the party.